Rain and All

Stories from the Old Testament don't sit well with me. This is primarily because they involve a God that tests humans. A God that keeps score, practices quid pro quo, and then doles out punishments for the sinner and blessings for the obedient. It has never felt good to think of God in such ways. 

I just finished reading the book of Job from the Old Testament. It's something that my girlfriend Shamanie and I decided to do together to try and better understand human suffering. She and I have kept our phone lines open to support one another during all hours of the night, as our lives have become marred in ways that we never could have imagined. And suffering feels bottomless.

The first chapters of the book of Job set up an upsetting scene. One where Satan triple-dog-dares God by saying that if he were to take away all of Job's blessings, that Job would end up showing his true colors by turning against God.

God takes the stupid dare and Job's suffering begins. 

Why, if there were a God, would he allow suffering? That is a question related to a line of study within theology called theodicy. We humans are centered on ourselves. Which is why when we suffer, we ask questions like:

•God, what have I done to deserve this? Tell me.
•Why are you making me suffer? It's unfair.
•What can I do to make you stop this pain? I'll do anything.

Our fixation on ourselves makes us believe that the only thing God cares about is us. But in the book of Job, we learn that God cares about other things like the wind, fire, rain, animals, etc. And sometimes, for reasons we don't understand, God commands the rain to go forth, and drench the earth. As a result, maybe a parched field can grow a harvest. Maybe the fish in the almost dried-up river can flourish. Maybe flowers can bloom. Also as a result maybe a baby drowns. And maybe a house get destroyed. 

And when we are privy to only the latter, we don't understand and we utter, "Why God, have you drowned my baby? Why God, have you destroyed my house?"

Because we humans are centered on ourselves we think suffering is a personal affront when it's not personal at all. Rain isn't personal. It just is. And the results of rain are part of something beyond our understanding. The results just are.

Job passes the test. And his blessings return. Neither the ending nor the beginning nor the middle impress or inspire me. Because the nature of the tricky test is oppressive and convoluted.

The story of Job and other Old Testament stories help me better understand why the New Testament has become such a force. Its message is one where we don't have to do anything to earn something. In fact, there is no way to earn something or pay for anything. Because it's already been earned and paid for us by fiat. All that is left to do is to accept it. Rain and all.